Wither Pluto...?

And so, in a landmark decision, the International Astronomical Union has declared that Pluto is no longer a planet.

In a move which was greeted with enthusiastic relief by intelligent people worldwide, and pitiful, misguided bleating by the ignorant masses, the IAU clarified the definition of “planet” as an astronomical term, and brought in the new terms “dwarf planet” and “small solar system body”. Pluto, seen here with its moons Charon, Nix and Hydra, declined to comment on the reclassification, but was said to be going about its daily business of orbiting the sun, apparently unaffected by the decision.

However, we did manage to get a word or two from Mike Brown from the California Institute of Technology, who discovered Xena. The new classification from the IAU also demoted his discovery from its place as the “tenth planet” to a dwarf planet, alongside Pluto. His response was supportive of the IAU decision:

"It's been a fun year having that whole 10th planet thing hanging around, but I can admit that deep down inside, it never felt right," Brown said. "I'm feeling a little relieved that they've done the right thing. I'm a little sad that we've lost the 10th planet, but I'm glad they got the science right."

Brown said he thinks the cultural world will eventually accept the scientific decision.

"If scientists can stick to their guns, I think the culture will eventually come around," Brown said. "But yeah, underdogs and warrior princesses are unhappy today."